I blew the dust away from this place.

I guess, what's better than key ing thoughts, imagination into a dead piece of art.

Or should I simply put it, the more emo thoughts?

I wonder if you'd manage to find this 1 day, but still, Ms H, the more valuable onces are those hand written. In spite of anger, you probably posted the entire thing that was hurting you.

Maybe it was right to post confessions, such that an outlet like that suddenly shocked me.

"My bf and i started knowing each other when we were in uol. Afterwards i switched to rmit.erhaps as the saying goes, u understand more about your partner after you got into relationship with them.

Throughout our 2 yrs, we quarrelled almost everyday due to our difference in views. Before he got into a relationship with me, he visited the prostitutes in geylang and had sex with 5 of them. He views cheating and polygamy as something that's okay, totally open to it. Doesn't think that its wrong. Always tells me he wants to have threesome with me and my bff or have a orgy party. Whether he's just having a fantasy or wants to do it in reality, these are inappropriate views to me and of course i would never agree to it. Moreover, he's in a relationship with me. If he's single, go ahead and do anything as a free man. To me, i find having sex before marriage is a no no and would like to reserve my virginity for my future husband. Fyi i'm not a christian. I just find it morally not right to have sex before marriage on my own part. I'm fine with it if my future husband has different sex partners before as long as he's clean and doesn't get the girl knocked up. Of course, he tried to get touchy with me even before we started a relationship and for the rest of it, i'm pretty sure you guys can guess it. I'm very unwilling to have sex with him. Didn't like it at all. Not that it was bad but i just didn't like sex before marriage and was also worried that something might happened even though there's protection. Moreover, he wasn't willing to take responsibility if something happens. Wants me to abort it if i was ever pregnant and doesn't care the mental and physical hurt that i will suffer. Like hello? If you don't want to take responsibility, obviously don't do it right. But everytime i said i didn't want it, he get extremely pissed and mad. And threatens me that he will go find other girls to do it if i couldn't satisfy him. So i had no choice but to give in to him. Besides sex issues, there's also integrity issues with him. He likes to manipulate and twist his words to his friends about me. Say things which are untrue including the posts that he posted here too. We have different lifestyles, different views about future, etc. we do not have trust in each other, do not agree with each other perspectives. Even he makes a mistake, he likes to paint it in a way such that i'm the cause of why he made the mistake. And of course, everyone sides him and thinks that its justifiable that he makes such mistakes. There are many more shit to the story.

Is there even a way to solve all our issues or is breaking up the only way? I don't see myself in The future with my bf. oh btw, sorry doesn't undo the damages. And sometimes the damage is so huge that not even a sorry works."
I won't explain, because it's like I'd be the victim and you'll be the attacker. Either way, I said before, an eye for an eye, makes the world blind. I told you to forgive certain things, but you went like "Im not that holy". I don't blame you, I could only say sorry.

It's time to evaluate myself, it's true that that side of me in unacceptable in the ways you were brought up. I don't consider myself a good man, I always told you that. I say good man ought to be politicians because that's where they're needed most.

Then you'll go like "I thought you'd change" or "I thought I could change you". We both changed each other. Is it for the better? Or was it for the worse? Im not sure, perhaps you wanna do a gauge and see?

I'd say I'm better. Because my life is fussed by you, my happiness is being forced by you, even my sadness is partly controlled by you. I told you before, when 2 becomes 1, everything multiplies. For the happy becomes happier and of course, the sad becomes sadder. Giggles turn into laughs, silent weep turns into a loud storm of tears.

It was something that you haven't come across before in your life. I don't know is that suppose to be good or bad, what I do know now is that you're hurt. Many a times, I always asked you, are you happier than before? I guess you are unable to answer because you would go "idk".

I remember you saying you wanna spend the rest of your life with Klayx. Yet, what does the future holds? Isn't it irony that the very person that you wanna spend your life with, hurts you the most?

& here you are saying that Im a contradicting person. Am I? Or are you the one?