Does everything still stands? Or is this some kind of dream?


Today is sat again.. Boring sat. Manage to push off my Piano lesson this morning, which i could have gone through, it's from 1045 - 1145 am, now is 12 pm le. I juz pushed it off as a matter of excuse for my sista, but e fact is... i'm emo ing.. badly.


I'm gonna finish up the few entries and things i wanted to put in for the past few days. Those days have indeed gone really busy and now i understand why admin is really tough; which i tink Chief Clerk is power, but abit dominant sometimes >.<


Carrying on.. don't understand what's wrong with her either. But seriously it made my game ytd cannot make it, and i couldn't sleep.

This is juz unexpected somehow, was interrupted by afternoon's game. Finishing the entry at 1+ now, the last day of August.

I seriously sorta mixed up all my feelings. I am numb, juz like the very few days. Why... i was suppose to.. have them all cleaned, i guess this is love, that's why. Maybe it's juz i'm holding on things which are non existence. What i believe in, is all but dreams.

In her eyes, ar all rubbish now. It juz looks like a wonderful dream, yet the music playing is sorrowful. All of a sudden, e lighting is gone. The entire scenario is purge into darkness... the main character.....

Depressed. I never expected you to wound it so deeply. On top of that, my birthday. I never really had a special bd, ever since.. that time jimmy pals celebrated with me. Every year was plain birthday wishies, i seriously don't mind at all. But.... last year, you couldn't even find an excuse out. This year? friend? i dun wan.. it juz makes me cry. Why?

Tears are flowing out of my eyes.. i don't know why. These is why i can't sleep last night. I find it hard to dish out everything inside. Even pooh can't help but be wet again; couldn't fetch tissue in time =X I lost my courage for things again. Performed badly for ytd's and today's dota.. i'm not saying is you. I feel like a complete fool, a total failure.

No matter how hard i tried.. i could only vent my anger on you sometimes. I don't know.. I know everything changes, I find it hard to accept. Juz like u did when you tt break up thing on our anniversary. This whole 1 year shdn't have been there at all. I'm happy for it, but.. why? There was no celebration.. juz tears again, in that quiet sleepy corner of the Changi Airport.

I could not help but ask why.. is not you bahs. Too stressed that it had to come to you that.. freedom was everything u wanted. That's y i'm a failure you see...

i can't continue this entry any more. sorry... no more energy to carry on. ="(