The part of me that never grows up

I hate it.

I've been pummeled down. Maybe by fatigue, exhaustion or probably simply, my hopes.

The concert was a blast, the best of whichever that has ever happened, but yet, I was missing out the supposedly 'bonus'.

Her and She.

Her was just really hoping her will turn up that her didn't even replied to my invitation. It was as if both of our worlds just collided during school and nothing else outside school? =X Heart aches.

She, was as good as gone. The reason why...Novo. That's how I wish to disconnect she, yet this isn't helping. It's so hard to wake up and not have she in my heart and mind. Somehow, those threads that bind are so difficult to cut off.

I've just gone soft entirely. If you ask me, I seriously just wished to stone a week away? I dun have that much time to do it.. the last time I tried, February wasn't enough and I was "bleeding" badly.. that was 2010. Maybe Mummy noticed it last year, that's why this year she's more concerned? No idea.. but the pain today was quite filling. Filling to occupy my mind to leave it totally no space to get rid of them.

Dunno what to say, it's 2am, I suppose to sleep at 1.30am. It's that I wanna cry and can't cry it out feeling again. I'm just weak.

Running away about it becoz I just can't let it out. On the other side, Her would just be "Earth calling Mars" I just didn't dare to go all out. I dun wanna lose her, yet would her give me a better reason to why am I stuck in this mess??

Just being mad at myself that my emotions are in a random spiral.

I really enjoyed Mirificus 11 (: Despite it being a totally draining day and I had hiccups over stuff here and there, it was really great and Sm, Fq, Xin, Md, Ck came down to support, as well as DJ n his Gf!! Looks like I fed him the right poison when I was swimming wif him, telling him to go get one. Hahahax, his wishy washy decision about his fac was correctly chosen!

Technically In Red Emotional Distress (TIRED) some random cock stuff I came out wif. NICE rite? Hahahax.

Nights (: Tml will be better.